The world is there for your dreams. (Even shitty ones.)

= my speakers sing [张栋梁 - 寂寞边界] = & = i'm feeling... [restless.] =

Looks like that something new will have to wait abit. zzz. Am in a "too-sian-to-do-anything" mood. Although i did buy a new pair of jeans... ! (Jeans? Since when does Mr. Cow buy/wear jeans?) Right. I don't, as I said before, peer pressure sucks. LOL. Just came home from some coffee with my buddy Mr. Huat. Two idiots with nothing else better to do when they're supposed to sleep drinks coffee together. (-_-) Well, had a nice chat with him and we've realised that his current beau isn't the prettiest tree in the forest. ROFL. (I'm sorry man, but thats the truth.)

Anyway,

Nothing new been happening in my life... Same old shit of working, sleeping, blah blah. I've not even been drinking much lately ! I miss drinking... grrr. Was talking to my friend on the topic of how someone can fall in love/like another. Is it always based on the fact of looks? OR rather, the way we feel when we're around that special someone. I've come to realise that my thing with di was probably one-sided. She wasn't that much into it as I was... I would guess that she tried... but it couldn't really work out for her... Ah, whatever. I just hope she's happy now. If she's happy, I'm happy too.

Anyway,

I was mentioning something that my ex-colleague told me before. It isn't always based on looks. If everyone were to fall in love with everyone based on looks, then AIDS would be on the super-rise ! Well, to quote what he told me; "There's got to be something that he/she has done to make you like her, sure you can like someone based on their looks, but based on the things they do.. you would fall in love with them." I pluck from someone else's mention; "You don't just fall in love with someone, you fall in love with the feelings you get when you are with them." Right. So how would I like someone? I can't figure that out myself ! Maybe that's why I've been a failure in this part of my life. I just can't understand it. I like someone, I do things to please that someone. We get together, but it fails. LOL. Sounds more like a joke to me. I AM a passionate person, (Or so I think.) I could try to be the perfect lover, but could she requite my love? But ya, I consider myself lucky. Lucky in a sense, I have memories to hold back to.
I quote 光良's 握你的手;

握你的手坚持到最后一秒钟
哪怕爱要冰凉了
至少让回忆是暖的
了解比爱难多了
我们都尽力了
也许温柔是停止挽留

握你的手像耳语轻声说保重
让眼睛就算湿了不只是痛也有感动
以前每一次挥手都为了再握手
但这一次是为了放手

And I think that I have gotten over it rather fast was due to the fact that the chemistry wasn't that strong. Those things that would make it a 轰轰烈烈 relationship. Sure, it was wonderful for me. (I sure hope it's the same for her.) But nothing really sparked between the both of us to make it a very unique and wonderful relationship. As the saying goes; "It takes two hands to clap." Doesn't really make a lot of noise when only one hand is slapping furiously in the air. lol. But I don't deny the fact that I will always love her. (A part of my heart will always have a place for her. She's THAT special to me.) Ah well, enough of my crap. Now, it's back to square one for me again. After a whirlwind of "love" that lasted for less than a month. I'm back to the same old boring crappy full of shit cow. (T_T)
..
..
..
..
Behold... The CowFather.

I just wish that I could relish in something called love.
Am I destined not to be with the one I fall head over heels in love with?
Or rather, to have that someone who will fall head over heels in love with me?


P/S: On a side note, I should take more pics of myself. LOL.

something new...

= my speakers sing [nothing.] = & = i'm feeling... [sleepy.] =

watch this space, stay tuned... something very new is coming your way !

there's always a first for everything...

= my speakers sing [nothing.] = & = i'm feeling... [refreshed.] =

Just did something that I haven't done in a very very long time. 5 - 6 years, in fact. I went to Tampines just now and I... shopped. Yes. You heard me. I shopped. It's really been awhile since I last bought some apparel for myself. I need more colors in my life. rofl. Nothing much though, just some Polo Tees but I smell the shopper in me slowly showing it's form. lol. Met with ah wai to catch up and also for opinions. lol. Been some time since I last saw him... really enjoyed meeting him and chit-chatting. (I sense more coming up... heh.)

Anyway,

Received some reviews about my previous post and it seems like this crude humour works for me. Expect some more edited versions comin up. LOL. As for now... Time to re-upload my songs to my zen... Hopefully Creative doesn't fail me a second time. Maybe I'll PS2 abit later on... WE8LE ! yay.

屋顶 is such a nice song... heh.

= my speakers sing [nothing.] = & = i'm feeling... [wozzy.] =

My zen died on me ! Fark ! After serving me well for half a year or so... It finally died. Auto-on and the earphone jack is seriously fucked. It's like listening to the karaoke version of the song whenever it's being played. lol.

Anyway,

Went down to Creative HQ at JURONG. Yes, Jurong where the HQ lies, together with me good friend, after waiting for my friend for around... 1hr and 15mins. Yes, I slept at my friend's void deck for 1hr plus whilst waiting(@$^%@^*$@). We reached Creative Labs at around 4:30pm plus? I thought it would be operating at office hours, but thankfully operating hours are from 11:00am to 7:00pm. *phew* Waited there for an hour plus before being served... The service sucks alot... But the customer care officer gladly offered a one-to-one exchange for my zen which aroused my suspicion. Why would they gladly offer a one-to-one exchange and not even bother to check the faults I had informed? There's got to be a conspiracy somewhere man... Maybe I'm just over-reacting. But I've got it changed and it's in a shade of pale blue which I rather like as a matter of fact... due to the blue lights used by the zen. Rather matching colors. But now I have to update my zen ALL OVER AGAIN. Yes, upload ALL the MP3s I had uploaded previously to my new set. Argh... couldn't really backup my playlists somemore... What a drag...

Anyway,

Met up with my colleagues after that and we stranded ourselves at Tampines not knowing what to do. We ended up playing pool at the pavillion and dropped over to KBox just after midnight. Since it closed at 2, everyone agreed that it was a very tiring day and so here I am, with a colleague staying over at my place. Stoning and uploading shitz to my zen and waiting for it to be completed.

Anyway,

Crossed over to the other side for the second time with another colleague of mine to hunt for PS2 games. 1 game, 4 Ringgit, SG $1.75. I finally bought the new WE8, God of War and GTA : San Andreas. Shopping over there is so so shiok.

On a sidenote, Ok... While we were at KBox, a random thought crossed my mind. I have sort of re-edited the song 屋顶 to a more pervertic and vulgar song. Enjoy !

[ 屋顶(Perv Version) ]

(男) 半夜睡不着觉
玩自己的 Lan Jiao
只好到屋顶找另一个高潮

(女)睡梦中被敲醒
我还是不确定
怎曾有变态色魔在对面的屋顶
我悄悄关上门
带着恐惧上去
原来是我梦里常出现的那个人

(男)那个人不就是我梦里
那变态的人
我们有同样的默契

(女)用内衣(男)用内裤
(合)排成爱你的形状ho ho
(女)在屋顶一个人自慰
(男)在屋顶和好色的人
(女)让星星点缀成
(合)最浪漫的夜晚
拥抱这时刻这一分一秒全都停止
(男)我就要来了...

And so, I should get some sleep. Hitting 2 days without proper rest can get a bit too strenuous, even for me. lol.

sometimes, a moment of peace is all you need.

= my speakers sing [nothing.] = & = i'm feeling... [warped.] =

nothing much to rant about... just received this interesting sms from a friend of mine... how nice it would be if I could achieve it...

缘份是上天所赐的，
快乐是要自己找的，
欢笑是朋友带来的，
幸福是靠自己争取的，
烦恼是用智慧自解的...

Work wise... It seems to be picking up... Can't screw up now... My life definately needs some boosting... My mind's in a twirl... I need to refocus again... Find a new aim in life... Maybe I should add a ! in my name... lol... Maybe I should learn how to cheer up more... Maybe... Just maybe...

argh.

= my speakers sing [nothing.] = & = i'm feeling... [blank.] =

Yes. One hour later, after recovering from the shock of my hp bill, I sit in front of my computer once more but with a different feeling. I'm feeling wimpy and fucked up all of a sudden. Why? I DO NOT KNOW. It's just one of those mood swings I guess. It's this kind of feeling where you can't really do anything about it but just feel like crap and hope not to offend anyone in the process? And you would do really really fucking stupid things just to irritate people? There's a raging war going in my mind. I just feel so full of angst... so pissed off... so helpless... Geez. /me *spiteful mode* I think I'll just down my bottle of chivas and smoke myself to hell. That sounds like a plan. In any case, who would care? hahahahahahaha back to the same line again.

Even if I'm gone, would anyone miss me? I doubt so...

Handphone bills are a pain in the arse.

= my speakers sing [Akon - Lonely] = & = i'm feeling... [shocked.] =

I just received my handphone bill from my sister under my door. It is around $85. !!! FYI, my previous bill was around $58 only. What a contrast. Calls made amounted to... $90+. This is still ok. The shocker is that...

my...

total...

sms...

sent...

was...

a whooping 897.

114 smses from M1 to M1, 783 smses from M1 to other operators. wow. Erm. Ever since I had a handphone, the max smses I ever sent was around 400+ only. This is definately a record. Plus, also a good reason for me to upgrade my plan... which leads me to another point... time for a change of handphone perhaps? *smells D500* hiak hiak hiak!

stuck in a moment that i cant get out of...

= my speakers sing [李圣杰 - 痴心绝对] = & = i'm feeling... [mummified.] =

Don't you ever get the feeling that you're stuck in a moment and everything seems to go downhill from there on? Well, I'm would say that I am in such a predicament right now... Can't focus when I blog anymore. Not implying that I'm a darn good blogger, but afterall... 90% of the shit I post are nonsensical stuff. I envy those who have the gift of fluent thoughts. Ideas just seem to flow smoothly for them and they are able to conjure up topics of relative interest to most people and can go on and on and on... It could be that I'm just whining... lol. They too have their "blogger's block" but I'm pretty sure they would recover soon enough. I know I won't. lol.

Anyway,

Enough of that shit. I can get kinda bored talking about my life in every single post... Not mentioning the fact that 8 out of my previous 10 entries contain something about me whining that I've been dumped and I'm feeling like a loser. But! I'm not stuck in a rut. No. I'm not. Sure, I will still think alot about her and those times we had... but still. It's over. Maybe... I'm just not the type of man she's looking for. I don't know. Have I moved on? I still don't know. Ah crap. Here I go again.
(._.")

I'm still not recovering from that nasty "so-called" bout of flu I got after the mahjong session at gib's. My throat feels like a "longkang". Whenever I swallow, I feel this lump against the back of my throat. Reminds me of my tonsilitis days... *shivers* I guess smoking and drinking won't do it any good either, aye? I'm such a contradicting moron. Here I am, telling people that I'm sick and I can't really consume dairy products and spicy stuff, there I go drinking and smoking as per normal. ROFL ! *slaps forehead with metal chair* Alotta good this will do me. heh. Well, as I say; "life's too short to be lived, enjoy every moment as if it's your last." Maybe I should just get that car afterall... *stupid thoughts running thru mind* hah.

Anyway,

Gonna work on Sunday night even though it's my first off day. Can't really help it when your boss dislikes you such an amount that he'll pull you out of a more simple duty and throw you to something more siong. Argh. Can't stay here much longer. I'm going bonkers just thinking abuot work. It's definately going downhill all the way from here...

I need a new environment...
I need to experience new things...
I need to make more friends...

And ya, I'm very much involved with my PS2 once again. It's nice to know that my PS2 will not talk back to me, argue with me, show me lan jiao face or fly me aeroplane. It's been there for me when I'm happy and sad... and I'm proud to call it my comfort source for the past few years. It definately has served it's master well. Oh well...

Games I'm currently playing...

1. The Punisher (Sadistic game filled with gore. My current fav.)
2. Time Crisis 3 (Gets really repetitive after 1 hour of play.)
3. Need for Speed : Underground 2 (I have a bad habit of buying games and not playing till long after. Besides, it's fun to see a stock Honda Civic running with NOS.)
4. Kingdom Hearts (Yes, it's an old game. I know. Rather enjoyable though.)
5. Devil May Cry 2 (Yes, I know 3's out. But this is fun ! :D)
6. GTA : Vice City (Nonsensical sadistic fun.)

Games I'm considering buying...

1. God Of War (Heard crazy reviews about it.)
2. Dead to Rights 2 (I loved part one.)
3. GTA : San Andreas (Should be rather enjoyable.)
4. Gran Turismo 4 (Still considering since mao has a spare copy...)
5. Devil May Cry 3 (Gib has a copy... should be able to kapo from him.)

Oh well... it's 2:24am... time for that almost routine nightly smoke... Amazing how much I'm able to sort out in between a couple of sticks... Heh. Bye all !

not much shit...

= my speakers sing [nothing.] = & = i'm feeling... [moodless.] =

aye. recovering well from my sickness... can start smoking liao wor. well, havent really fully recovered... still have those coughs and runny noses... as much as i'm ready to go... i'll survive... for now...

was supposed to work last night, well, midnight just now... last min received a call from my colleague saying that its cancelled... or rather, postponed to another date... wtf ! oh well... more shit from my supervisor... doesnt he always gives us shit...

anyway,

just came back from simpang... cant really order much things when you cant take milk... so i ventured into the unknown and ordered nescafe-O.......... ..... it sucks. LOL. then went over to another friend's house to catch the insanely boring liverpoot vs Juventus match. such a disappointment. Juve lost. wth. liverpoot vs chelsai for a Champions League semi final? u gots to be kiddin me man. standard drop already lo...

anyway,

it's 535am and i started bloggin this entry at 2... before i left for simpang. now. i need to sleep. pronto. tmr, got to wake up early... kenna conned to go ikea with someone... (@$^(#%^#% oh well, till i have more nonsense, take care peeps.

im sick !

= my speakers sing [nothing.] = & = i'm feeling... [sick.] =

yes. after half a year. i finally succumbed to taking mc. since my tonsil op... last year october... till now... clean mc record man. fuck. seafood + alcohol = fever/sore throat. 2 days of mc. i guess i'll be staying home to recuperate. so much shit left at my office to finish... argh... cant even rest peacefully without thinking about work... cant wait to finish my paperwork ASAP. argh... till then... i'll be at home rotting.

argh. fuck. it's been awhile since im feeling like this...

= my speakers sing [nothing.] = & = i'm feeling... [sickish.] =

aw man... finally met my man mao last night at caesars... after a month or so experiencing Thailand, he came back home to good ol' Singapore. each of us finished our bottles of chivas and he actually opened another bot ! omg. it was a very hard whacking session yesterday... for me that is... whacked drink after drink... why? i do not know... then ended up at gib's playing mahjong... and i'll be damned. first hand i managed a 清一色. by the end of the game... i was the overall winner i think... i managed to win and i don't remember how i did it ! ^^" and when we left around daybreak... i couldn't stomach the twirling chivas anymore... *life door open* *merlion of simei !* and how ironic that next to the dustbin were 2 empty bottles of wine and i actually hovered over to puke on them... LOL. so that if someone walks past, it would be a very simple picture to understand? right. LOL.

anyway,

upon reaching home, i fell asleep like a dead log. and when i woke up at around 2 or 3pm... i discovered that my floor had these few blotches of blood... i looked at my feet and wtf ! my right middle toe had a fucking cut on it ! which led me to remember something i did before i slept last night... i was in my room drinking water from my water bottle when it dropped and landed on my right foot. dismissing it as nothing... i went to sleep... little did i realise that it had already cut my toe and blood was oozing out ! nbcb ! and of course, my bedsheet has a couple stained spots on it as well. argh... oh well... shit happens. and i'm feeling mighty queasy today... since i woke up till now... my colleague called me for some things to settle at around 8pm... but i was feeling too sick to go down... maybe i'll take mc tomorrow... maybe i'll just work and die there... it's been awhile since i last fell sick... since last year... october? (Fast Fact: I used to be sick almost religiously every 3 to 4 months due to my tonsilitis. Ever since I removed my tonsils, I have not fallen sick even once... Up till now. I think.) coming to half a year without any MC already... and does anyone notice it? noooooooooo. ah fuck it. if i'm really sick, then i can't work. but i've got so much paperwork to settle... fuck. i think i'm gonna puke again. ah fuck it.

all i wish now is for someone to be by my side...
someone to show care and concern about me...
someone...
like my LAO BU?
...
ok. not funny.

my first time...

= my speakers sing [李圣杰 - 手放开] = & = i'm feeling... [excited and tired] =

yes. amao is back ! after a month or so... he's back from Thailand. of course, he jio-ed me to go caesars but... fark ! couldnt meet him last night... had to go on a makan trip with my colleagues, which brings me to another point...

my first time... yes. i gave my virgin trip to my team. my virgin trip out of singapore. first chop my on me brand new. yes. brand new passport ! (for those who dont know me, i didnt really like the idea of travelling so i put off applying for a passport for the past... er, decade or so.) i was damn excited on our way there... although we jammed at the causeway for an hour or so and only reached JB around 1130pm? and i waited since 7pm. hahahahahahaha. the journey was rather precarious... given that we had no idea wtf the signboards were saying and all of us were following closely to each others' vehicle... went past a seaside and ended up at some restaurant by the roadside... but it was all good... the makan session lasted for 2 hours odd. ate damn loads of seafood and when the total bill came... woo hoo ! lets just say, each person had to pay around only S$10+ ! shiok man ! of course, the cigs and barble gum were cheap too ! ^^

anyway,

been singing alot rather recently... my voice is also pretty much gone... last night after the makan session, a couple of my colleagues and i adjourned to Kbox Cineleisure since it was like... 2am? and the place closes at 5am. (wow.) pretty much sang ourselves silly... hahaha. i should start to take a mini-break from singing... hm... no. hahahaha singing is fun ! as i said to my good friend, im a certified 100% singing whore ! hahahaha.

anyway,

had a close shave just now... dropped my freaking new $50 zippo on the floor and yes, the shape of the zippo was altered when i picked it up on the floor. MAJOR DAMAGE. luckily, due to the smart thinking of mr cow, i managed to twist, turn and mould the zippo back into shape. *phew* thank god. i couldnt imagine if i wasnt able to turn it back to the original shape. *heart pain* i wan to watch be cool ! hopefully this sat would be a good day... heh. alot running through my mind now but i cant just seem to put it into words. till then, i shall prepare myself for work first and maybe jot down more shit when i come home from work tomorrow. sayo-the-nara !

love? what love?

= my speakers sing [nothing.] = & = i'm feeling... [sticky.] =

true love is found,
when you see her flaws,
understand her weaknesses,
oversee her imperfections,

and still love her for all that she is.

busy busy busy, like a bee.

= my speakers sing [李圣杰 - 痴心绝对] = & = i'm feeling... [confused.] =

hm... these past few days has been a very very busy period for me. working non-stop. work sleep work. glad it's all over now... im on leave today ! going to jb for makan session with my whole team ! imagine that, 18-20 ppl sitting at a table enjoying a hearty seafood meal ! Oooo i cant wait.

anyway,

spent the night at gib's... mahjong, drinking, pool, soccer+ps2. omg. that is the life man. well, i lost at mahjong(AGAIN.). 3 dollars isnt much... considering we played .10/.20 only. friendly la... but its the process of playing that counts. i performed another unique 13 wonders for the third time of my mahjong career and it lacked 3 tiles ! arghhhh when will i ever succeed? ... after the traumatising session of mahjong, i suggested to gib that we take his father's car and go pa pool, since it was like... only midnight... went over to fusion... stayed there and we had a wonderful game of 9 ball. at least i was enjoying kicking his silly ass. rofl. went back to his side and decided to stay over since i was really really tired... 24+hrs without sleep and packed fill with activities isn't that relaxing... lol. watched "the wedding date" with a good friend of mine in the afternoon, wasn't really that enjoying although it had some twisted points in the show... (what else... but free sex.) heh. had ajisen for the second time of my life. grrr... jipun food... i only love sushi and sashimi ! haha. next show to watch, "Be Cool!" one of me most favoured actors, and no, it aint Danny De Vito. its John Travolta ! aint this man the coolest ! style, class, flair~ since Grease Lightning ! hahaha. (and yes. i've watched that show before and i actually quite enjoy it. i have kapo-ed the soundtrack from my uncle. hahaha.)

anyway,

just came home not long ago from a last min ktv session with my colleagues... damn hp batt die so fast. spent the whole day without my hp ! felt abit insecure at first... but... it's a nice feeling... knowing that no one will be able to disturb you throughout the whole day... haha. action packed day... woke up at gib's at 5pm ! i slept at 5am ! 12hrs of un-interrupted rest ! shiok arrrrrr. alvin dropped by my place at around 8+ to show me his latest gaming frenzy, Fifa Street© and it looked rather interesting, although i couldn't really win the comp and i discovered that one of my beloved ps2 controllers was spoilt ! :~~~ oh well, not much time to play games also...

anyway,

i digress way too fast and too much. i've been thinking about myself the last couple of days... is this what i really want in my life? pack my life with activities, meet friends all the time, not spend time alone so i wont think on things? ... maybe? maybe not... have i forgotten and moved on? frankly speaking... i cant answer that, mayb cos im running... running away from reality cos i know that sooner or later, it'll come slap me in the face one day and till then, i will have to deal with it one way or another. for all i know, im enjoying myself right now. meeting my friends to do the things i like. doing everything the way i want it, how i want it. since i have a new motto in life... why not abide by it? im 23 and im already waiting to go... since i have only one life, why not just enjoy every min of it...

*toast* to more drinking !
*toast* to more ps2 games !
*toast* to a better life ! be it single or attached !
*toast* to making an impact on ppls' life by making them happy !
*toast* to me able to drink whenever i want to !

曾经我以为我自己会后悔
不想爱的太多痴心绝对
为你落第一滴泪
为你做任何改变
也唤不回你对我的坚决...

Survey pt 2?

= my speakers sing [Sounds from tv.] = & = i'm feeling... [blanked out.] =

hm. this is becoming a habit. i feel that its a mini friendster now ! wtf !

Description of Your First Name of: Ming
Although the name Ming creates idealism and the urge to help others, we emphasize that it limits self-expression and friendly congeniality with a moody disposition. This name, when combined with the last name, can frustrate happiness, contentment, and success, as well as
cause health weaknesses in the nervous system, heart, lungs and bronchial area.

The name of Ming gives you a very idealistic nature. Your desire for peace and harmony causes you to withdraw from situations where there is friction and acrimony. You are quite reserved and inclined to feel sensitive and self-conscious, even though you strive to appear poised and confident. Being rather secretive in many ways, and not liking people to pry into your affairs restrict opportunities for friendship; not until you feel you can trust others do you open up to them. The desire to help others and the generous side of your nature attract those who take advantage of you.

wow. this is some scary shit ! wana have a go? try it...

Survey?!

= my speakers sing [光良 - 童话] = & = i'm feeling... [light headed.] =

TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name:	Hoe MS AKA Cow AKA conf!d3nce
Birthday:	04/10/82
Birthplace:	SG
Current Location:	SG
Eye Color:	brown
Hair Color:	black with a tinge of brown
Height:	176?
Right Handed or Left Handed:	Righty.
Your Heritage:	True Blue Hainanese
The Shoes You Wore Today:	brown shoes. (wtf?)
Your Weakness:	Fragile heart.
Your Fears:	Height, Sea, Bicycles(Bad childhood memories).
Your Perfect Pizza:	shitza. dont really like pizza.
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year:	Quit Smoking. Buy a CAR. Get killer ABs.
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger:	nbcb.
Thoughts First Waking Up:	time?
Your Best Physical Feature:	15" dick. i'd wish. my height i guess. voice considered?
Your Bedtime:	super duper irregular.
Your Most Missed Memory:	... something sad.
Pepsi or Coke:	COKE ! (for the time being.)
MacDonalds or Burger King:	if no choice bk i suppose.
Single or Group Dates:	Anything also can jalan.
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea:	Lipton.
Chocolate or Vanilla:	chocolatte !
Cappuccino or Coffee:	kopi siew dai.
Do you Smoke:	erm. yes. rather heavy in fact.
Do you Swear:	erm. yes. rather heavy in fact.
Do you Sing:	erm. yes. rather alot in fact.
Do you Shower Daily:	of course.
Have you Been in Love:	... yes.
Do you want to go to College:	sg equivalent is poly right? then i've graduated liao lo.
Do you want to get Married:	yip.
Do you belive in yourself:	why do u think i call myself conf!d3nce.
Do you get Motion Sickness:	nope.
Do you think you are Attractive:	hell no.
Are you a Health Freak:	sometimes.
Do you get along with your Parents:	yip.
Do you like Thunderstorms:	hell yea.
Do you play an Instrument:	u mean wank?
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol:	hehehe. yes.
In the past month have you Smoked:	hehehe. yes.
In the past month have you been on Drugs:	hehehe. no. never will.
In the past month have you gone on a Date:	define date.
In the past month have you gone to a Mall:	yes.
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos:	nope. bad teeth.
In the past month have you eaten Sushi:	yip.
In the past month have you been on Stage:	nope.
In the past month have you been Dumped:	... knnbccb, what kinda question is this. yes la yes la.
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping:	i got fear of sea remember?
In the past month have you Stolen Anything:	no. duh.
Ever been Drunk:	not that i remember of.
Ever been called a Tease:	no.
Ever been Beaten up:	no.
Ever Shoplifted:	hm. yes.
How do you want to Die:	i cant answer that.
What do you want to be when you Grow Up:	my dream.
What country would you most like to Visit:	hell.
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color:	not 2 funky for me. thx.
Favourite Hair Color:	not 2 funky for me. thx.
Short or Long Hair:	preferably long.
Height:	shorter then me can liao lo.
Weight:	i see happy can liao lo.
Best Clothing Style:	not 2 funky for me. thx.
Number of Drugs I have taken:	0. NIL.
Number of CDs I own:	many.
Number of Piercings:	1.
Number of Tattoos:	0.
Number of things in my Past I Regret:	1.
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!

i was influenced by someone. peer pressure sucks. lol.

D.R.E.A.M.

= my speakers sing [my own voice] = & = i'm feeling... [plastered.] =

D.R.E.A.M. = Drugs Rule Everything About Me.

hahaha. heard this song from the Transplants at a colleague's place today. that bloody nbcb made me walk from tampines interchange to his house just to get his muthafuggin scrummy ass outta bed ! wtf ! 1830 to 1930hrs. what a bloody long walk. but at least he accompanied me to caesars for a drink later on...

so far my conquest of the coca cola shit has been well... deposited 90% of the applications at various 7-11s and now im only waiting to deposit a motherload at cathay... dont know why, i just have a feeling that the winner for the grand draw would be picked from that location. Oooo the excitement is killing me. wandered in the streets after he went to pick up his current beau, walked and walked and lo and behold, i stumbled upon my sis. what a freaking small world. stumbling upon so many people recently... but why not her? haha. oh well, had a mini gathering session with her bf n their friend at tampines 201... was busy smoking away while they were engaging in their conversations and it suddenly dawned on me that i really cant do without company...

i wasnt like this before... i can still remember the secondary school days where i am the king of my world. i could go anywhere do anything all alone... and i actually really enjoyed it. nowadays, it just seems to be a torture even taking the train alone... whats happening to me??? i do not know. if anyone can help me on this, pls, let me know !

anyway,

met me new good friend at simpang for supposedly dinner/supper which i couldnt stomach at all. woah. this is a first, mr hms wasting food. so unlike him. oh well, i guess with 1/3 to 1/2 a bottle of chivas swimming in your stomach is never good news. im kinda happy for my friend... being single and enjoying whats happening around her life. its like deja vu but in the different direction. maybe this will help clear my mind of some thoughts when i see it from a fresh perspective. i dont know. but i hope that she can help me with some things that are left lingering in my head... hahaha...

for now, i wan to sing. yes. i just wan to sing. sing my lungs out as some might say, sing like i've never sang before. (for those who have never heard me sing or during secondary school, i have changed a little... no longer the timid mofo who didnt really dared to raise his voice whenever theres a ktv session. i actually jio ppl for ktv now!) i wan to sing, i wan to play pool, i wan to hang out with my good friends. i wan a life. i wan my life back. who can give it back to me?