Gelare Gelare...

= my speakers sing [nothing.] = & = i'm feeling... [tired.] =

I just bought a new gfx card, GeForce FX 5200 256mb for... $105. Can't really say bargain since it's an Inno3d OEM... but still. LOL. I've also watched The Jacket and I must say, it's a rather disturbing movie concerning the mind of a "supposed" psycho. Theres a twist in the story, but I'd recommend it only for those who appreciate shows like Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Still. It was enjoyable. And... I had Gelare twice ! ... lol. Sinful delights as someone might put it. Geez... the whipped cream and ice cream is enough to last me for a couple of weeks ! LOL.

Anyway,

Heres a little something I received from my colleague... Consider it a moment of laughter. Especially for the ladies. LOL.


Scene 1

Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules:

"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?"

His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex here at seven o'clock every night ......... whether you're here or not."
(DAMN SHE'S GOOD!)


Scene 2

Husband and wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding anniversary!

The husband yells, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads:
"Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever "

"Yeah?" she replies. "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads:
"Here Lies My Husband Stiff At Last"


Scene 3

Husband (a doctor) and his wife are having a fight at the breakfast table. Husband gets up in a rage and says, "And you are no good in bed either," and storms out of the house.

After sometime, he realizes he was nasty and decides to make amends and rings her up.
She comes to the phone after many rings, and the irritated husband says, "what took you so long to answer the phone?"
She says, "I was in bed."
"In bed this early, doing what?"
"Getting a second opinion!"


Scene 4

A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement. He is so proud of himself, that he starts calling his wife, "Mother of Six" inspite of her objections.

One night, they go to a party. The man decides that it's time to go home and wants to find out if his wife is ready to leave as well. He shouts at the top of his voice, "Shall we go home 'Mother of Six?' His wife, irritated by her husband's lack of discretion, shouts right back, "Anytime you're ready, Father of Four."


Scene 5

A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, "Please wake me at 5:00 AM." He left it where he knew she would find it.

The next morning, the man awoke, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't awakened him when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The message on the paper read, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up."

Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.

God may have created man before woman, but there is always a rough draftbefore the masterpiece.

... right.